Wednesday, March 31, 2010

12.

Rachel to Amber:

you're a hybrid mom. a leader in the new feminist movement of maintaning a social life while raising a child alone. welcome to the new regime of motherhood. it's hard to be a pioneer, but you're an excellent mother and you deserve to have fun. it's not time for you to settle down into parenting meetings and book clubs with other moms who are obsessed with corny romance novels. you actually have a life to live!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

11.

Bennett-

I keep seeing ads for Mormon dating, gay chat sites, and how to become an ordained minister in the church of satan. I don't think Facebook knows what to make of me.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

10.

Mohammed Alzaharani Mar 17, 2010 11:34 PM:
I mias oou'bnn

Rachel:
I miss you toooooooi so drunks

Mohammed:
No I honed no idea put futun I an , let's hadg oi some yonecv hahaha imtagagafsgaga shoe

9.

AMBER:

You sit in a small room all naked with your feisty attitude? You're begging to be sexually harassed, fax machine. You're begging.

random dialogue with your fax machine going on in my head

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

8.

Bennett:

"I'll walk down the aisle in a MarcoMarco body suit, with my bride affixed to my pelvis."

Thursday, March 11, 2010

7.

Rachel:

- i can't help it if i am your number one fan.

Caity:

- haha it's because I'm so cool.... My apartment smells of rich mahogany. Merlin Olsen comes over, on occasion.

Rachel:

- LOL and we only drink the best brandy known to man on your red satin sheets.

Caity:

-You know it. In our leopard print robes...

Rachel:

-
no, they're just straight leopard caity

Caity:

- LOL next to the fireplace while listening to Barry Manilow.

Rachel:

- and stroking our... cats.

6.

Bennett:

-I had a teacher in high school who used to DJ at the Hi-Dive and whenever drunk guys would come up and hit on her, she would pretend to be deaf.

-She was also a Denver Rollergirl with HUMONGOUS boobs.

-I learned a a fuckton of math that year. :-):-)

5.

Rachel:

-i never get to traipse about in my underwear

Bennett:
-Might I recomend it? Especially right before being really productive. The change in levels of procrastonation is quite invigorating.

-It really is the only way to start your day.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

4.

Rachel:

i did something naughty

;);)

Amber:

doooo telllll

Rachel:

i bought an $80 juicy couture shirt

it just came to me

and a $30 dress

on credit

eep

Amber:

rachel

that was not naughty.

3.

"Our cave of a bedroom is dangerous. I slept til almost noon. Again." -Kevin.

dangerous indeed.

2.

"maybe if i tell chicks i'd hit it, they'll respond and be like...holy shit..that guys has god's cock between his legs, i can't turn that down" - Me

pretending i understand what goes on in Ian's head. right before amber told me about her idea for a blog like this.

1.

a blog devoted purely toward exploiting the funny and interesting quotes from the people in my life - a stolen idea from my lovely sister.